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Tuesday, October 23, 2012

DIYConspiracy: Insightful Internettings with your Uncle Crud - Ep 1. Cheese


Sometimes, insight into the NWO can come from the most unexpected of places. The following is a transcript of a chat I had with a backward fellow of Russian descent on Morality Mountain's Public IRC Server. BEHOLD, the power of cheese... and cellphones!


Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): Теперь вызов принят

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): Goddammit, backwards R's are the domain of Toys-R-US and mentally retarded 5 y/o's

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): lol

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): You know what happened when my nephew wrote a backwards r? I did like any other red-blooded American uncle, and I shot that paper up with my AR-15, and set the house on fire. Now he has a healthy fear of all things Ruskie.

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): lol or did you turn him into one because your traumatized him

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): No, I used destructive fear, not constructive fear. Fucking liberals... you just don't get that CON means CON, as in to be dirty and such... and don't you dare try and use my logic against me - like "Oh, you mean CONservative?" - which I'm not - I'm a DEservative!

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): well you DEserve these

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я я

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): backwards r let the seep in

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): "Hey Bob, what we gonna do with all these extra Toys-R-US sign parts?" You best enjoy your backwards R's while you can, Ruskie - cuz' they ain't gonna feel too good spinning sideways in yer ass. Fucking Crayola factory explosion up in here...

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): why

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): Because the Cyrillic alphabet is an enemy to American freedom, that's why.

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): why

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): Because, teaching children how to write their ABC's an PDQ's all funny-like, so no REAL Americans can read their chicken scratchings, leads to retarded children (because we can't understand them). Retarded children lead to communism sounding good, and communism sounding good leads to a RoboIslamoFascistNaziSocialist wealth redistribution black hole that creates a white hole in the pocket of an alternate universe welfare queen! THAT'S WHY!

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): how

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): Because when the Founding Fathers (PBUT) designed the schematics for the GRAND OLD USA, they built in a kill switch, one that would destroy the country if the red skinned savages ever took it back over. It just so happens that backwards R's don't roll down the pipe too well, and each one bumps the kill switch. It's halfway on now, that's why we have a mocha latte president an men are having icky gay anal sex with other men right in front of the elementary schools! NOT MY JESUS!

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): why

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): So the red skinned savages couldn't have America! It's simple civics, man.

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): it makes so much since thats why cheese is yellow

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): Exactly! Yellow is traditionally associated with WHAT emotion?

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): happy

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): No, Yellow is associated with fear! The cheese is tasty and that's yellow. Now what have the NWO architects been pushing lately? CHEESE SAUCE. See, cheese sauce is good - it makes everything awesome. You FEEL happy when you eat it. Now what does cheese sauce like to do? IT RUNS! It's all a subliminal precedent set up in the minds of our youth! YELLOW Cheese sauce = Running Scared = Happy! They're going to cause America to fall!

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): no yellow is what the first smile face was used with see its even bigger then you thought what are yellow smiley face associated follow me its text and what are text associated with

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): ok its cell phones and who is the largest consumers of cell phones

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): Cell phones?

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): the youth consumer, and what do youth and cell phones have in common

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): They are easy to get in Thailand?

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): well yes, and they are susceptible to programming so

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): They are being hacked!

Moochie Powpow (backwards-R lovin' Trotskyite): exactly

Crud O'Matic (dignified gentleman): Fucking ChiComs, shouldn’t have ever let them have oxygen. Wait, that leads back to the cheese - digital programming, with a layer of tactile conditioning to cement it in place! OMG let's get this to the presses!

http://www.reddit.com/r/Shit_My_Toilet_Says/comments/11yacm/diyconspiracy_insightful_internettings_with_your/

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