Did you guys know that the moon killed JFK on 9/11? With an inter-dimensional shape-shifting lizard alien nuclear space laser?
It was because during the moon landing hoax (that took place on the moon), Buzz Aldrin hit a line drive with the moon's Gulf club of Tonkin, and bent it into the 4th dimension - where our expanded consciousness that was due to arrive in 2012 lived. Murdering him dead in his shower. Thanks, Buzzkill Aldrin. See what I did there?
The moon proceeded to poke Neil Armstrong in the chest, demanding to know who took out the hit on his buddy, Expanded Consciousness. Buzz Aldrin interjected, by stubbing his patented NASA space cigar out in the moon's eye, and coldly responded in his best 1920's gangster accent: "We're Jack Kennedy's boys, See?! We do as we please, ya dirty rat!"
The details of what happened in the next few decades are fuzzy, but we have it in the Zapruder film, knock down, drag out, other violent euphemism, evidence of this spectacular event.
Clearly you can see the head of Kennedy fly violently back & to the left. What these other conspiracy theorists fail to point out (because they are NWO after all) is that this was also partially because of the moon's gravity violently pulling at President Kennedy's feet - causing his head to fly back - as if he were a wet towel being snapped on America's bare ass.
Therefore proving that there was not only a gunman on the grassy knoll, but that this knoll gunman was THE MOON! How could the moon's gravity so affect the president if the moon was not there in person? Hmmm? ANSWER THAT, WARREN WORSHIPER!
Well, that's it for today, kids. Remember to keep studying your copies of "The Protocols of the Elders of Zion", and remember, if captured, to eat all your special fizzy vitamins that Jesus gave you!
Loose lips sink ships!
Slavishly serving up nuggets of ridiculous bullshit, spewn forth from my horrendously polite and correct porcelain god from beyond the grave of the stars - Commodeus. Then, some cookies and punch. The blood and teeth flavored kind.
If it isn't PAINFULLY obvious to you, Shit my Toilet Says deals with Parody, Dark/Sick Humor, and general Weird-Ass subject material. If you want to get all butthurt about it - please kindly GO FUCK YOURSELF. Consider this your TRIGGER WARNING.
BTNotice
Please, feel free to smash a BitCoin in the face - and send me it's teeth: 1JNGXVUqMxGV9mrfD9eWCtfaj2FHYdGhBj
Thursday, September 26, 2013
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